When we interview people and decide to give them the go ahead to join our global team of Kids Life Studio brand ambassadors there is an element of gut feeling....initially....

As the founder, when I speak to Childrens change makers, I use my intuition to “feel” their true intentions. Usually this is what I call my “goose bump” moment! Where I connect to the persons heart.

Once that is done we move into the formalities. A checklist of criteria we look for in brand ambassadors. One of the MOST IMPORTANT things we look for is attitude over aptitude.

Yet this is probably the hardest thing to measure initially....since some people choose to hide their true colours until later.

So we ask ourselves some of these questions when screening “leaders” to join our organisation as change makers for children:

Do they have a good foundation for coaching children already in place? This isn’t necessarily formal education but could be that little secret...

Just imagine. You are in a burning building. Your toddler is with you. You are on the 16th floor.  You can't use the lift. So you run down the stairs but cannot get past the second floor. You have nowhere to go. So you climb onto a balcony.  All you can think about is saving your child.

What would you do?

A South African mother did the unthinkable. As she was engulfed in smoke, she made a split second decision. She threw her 2-year old from the first floor of the burning building, into her neighbours arms. She trusted they would catch her little girl and keep her safe. 

Why did this happen?

This was in the aftermath of a rampage of violence, riots, looting and arson throughout the city of Durban. My old hometown. The place I was born.

The very spot this happened, I have fond childhood memories of holiday shopping with my mom and my accompanying treat at the "Wimpy" for a burger, chips and milkshake. 

My childhood is a far cry to the one currently being...

The coaching and education industry is a huge industry (and growing). Parents  today are more inclined than ever before in history to invest RESOURCES (time, money, etc) to acquire skills, knowledge and transformation not only for themselves but for their children.

 Which begs the question: why do so many Kids Life Coaches seem to struggle?

 I don’t mean to be critical, but it really is...

Sometimes we try to hard to fit in. We strive for perfection. We people please. We perform according to other people’s expectations.

The result....

We end up losing ourselves.

I can speak from personal experience as to what it feels like to want to be a biological mom but knowing this will never ever be possible.

I have yearned to participate in “mommy” conversations about pregnancy, teething, breast feeding but I will always be an outsider.

Most of all I will never fully understand what it means to have protective instincts as a parent.

Yet my whole entire life revolves around being an advocate for children’s well-being. I feel so strongly and passionately about getting it “right” in childhood purely because I can remain objective.

This vantage point allows me to see the unvarnished truth that parents can fail to see. It doesn’t make me a judge...it doesn’t mean I have all the answers...it doesn’t mean I am always well received....

Sometimes we try to hard to fit in. We strive for perfection. We people please. We perform according to other people’s expectations.

The result....

We end up losing ourselves.

I can speak from personal experience as to what it feels like to want to be a biological mom but knowing this will never ever be possible.

I have yearned to participate in “mommy” conversations about pregnancy, teething, breast feeding but I will always be an outsider.

Most of all I will never fully understand what it means to have protective instincts as a parent.

Yet my whole entire life revolves around being an advocate for children’s mental well-being. I feel so strongly and passionately about getting it “right” in childhood purely because I can remain objective.

This vantage point allows me to see the unvarnished truth that parents can fail to see. It doesn’t make me a judge...it doesn’t mean I have all the answers...it doesn’t mean I am always well...

Compassion is a concept foreign to some. The dictionary says:

"The meaning of compassion is to recognize the suffering of others and then take action to help. Compassion embodies a tangible expression of love for those who are suffering."

As a kids life coach, this should sit at the core of how you support children. Whilst not all children may be "suffering" in the true sense of the word, nonetheless taking their personal situation into account is what counts. 

Sometimes when things get painful because the truth is to hard to bare, people shut down and disconnect.   As a kids life coach, choosing to be curious and choosing to connect is harder than choosing to walk away and giving up.  Shutting yourself down and joining the ranks of those who 'judge' a child who is labelled or badly behaved, is avoiding the path of compassion. 

To be vulnerable means to say things as they are. As a kids life coach, your job is to not sit on the fence. You need to be brave and...

It absolutely amazes me how so many people profess to be a “Child Wellbeing Expert” and “Kids Life Coach”. They are well meaning and obviously have a BIG heart for helping children. But....does this make them an expert?

Come on, you need more than a short course online to become an expert! Also you simply cannot do an adult life coaching course and think you can coach children successfully! Not to mention that if somebody has never even been exposed to children or had any experience, it will take them extra long to be considered an "expert".

So what makes you an expert as a Kids Life Coach?

Well for me it boiled down to these 3 things for me:

1. Ask for help:  When I started coaching almost two decades ago, I had already attended a multitude of courses and I had two degrees - one in teaching and in psychology of education. Yet....nothing seemed to make 100% sense because I had a whole lot of puzzle pieces but I didn't know what the bigger picture looked...

I have trained and certified life coaches for children in over 40 countries since 2009. Some of them go on to be very financially successful and others give up and go back to "work" and give up on their dreams.

Why?

Well I have identified that getting clients as a Kids Life Coach is not about "selling"....it is about this ONE thing...

SERVING!

You might be wondering, why does this matter? Perhaps you run a successful coaching practice with lots of clients and work you enjoy. But let me ask you this – do any of the following sound familiar?

• You hold your breath at tax time and hope you have enough to cover your bills.
• Seeing the number in your bank account stresses you out so you avoid even looking at it.
• You aren't comfortable with telling prospective clients how much you charge.
• You don’t know, on any given day, how much cash is in your business bank account.
• It feels like your clients take forever to pay you yet you don't enjoy reminding them to do so.

So why am I...

I have been speaking to a lovely mom today who feels she has failed her daughter. This wasn’t deliberate or through neglect....she had just faced lots of trauma herself and felt unsupported.

She said one of the hardest things for her was feeling judged and being told repeatedly she was a “bad mom”.

Be mindful of judging those that you perceive to be “bad” parents. There is always a backend story....that you don’t know....as a Kids Life Coach!

As a Secret Parent I have seen how hard it can be for biological parents. Wowzer!!! Sometimes life can throw curve balls to families that knock them back dramatically.

In my experience coaching children for over two decades, the one thing that conquers all of this....

Is when parents find unconditional love grounded in compassion.

So stop judging the parents of the children that you coach and just try to put yourself in their shoes....empathy can take you a long way. Parents don't need judgement, they need...